Colonel Colon

Colonel Colon (portrayed by Werner Daehn) is a character featured in the Speed Racer film and the Videogame.

Background[]

He is the lead driver for Sempre Fi-Ber's racing team in the Casa Cristo 5000, being one of the racers bribed by Cruncher Block to take out Speed's team.

Casa Cristo 5000[]

Colon and his teammates can be noticed at the start of the race and in the Zunubian Desert dunes before being properly introduced. Afterwards, they are seen bumping Taejo's car repeatedly until Speed comes to help. At the end, Racer X knocks out a driver from the Thor-Axine team, causing him to crush Colon's car.

Grand Prix[]

Colonel Colon's name and his team Sempre Fi-Ber are seen in the racer list from the Grand Prix. However, neither he nor his car are actually in the race.

Videogame[]

In the videogame, he is the ally of Delila and the rival of Prince Kabala.

Quotes[]

Character Selected (Wii Exclusive)[]

"Semper Fi!"
"Hooh-rah!"
"Gung-ho and ready to go!"

Being Slipstreamed[]

"As you like."
"Time to pump and dump this turd!"
"Wouldn't be the first to try and ride my glory!"
"I'll shake you to pieces!!"
"C'mon, race like a hero not a zero."

Being Overtaken[]

"I love a good chase."
"Woah! You got some nerve!"
"Do you know who I am! I am Colonel Colon!"
"How dare you disrespect my rank?"
"I will hunt you down and rip out your exhaust pipe!"

Slipstreaming the Player[]

"Bumper to bumper."
"Do you feel the heat?! Here I come!!"
"Chhhaaaaarrrrrggggeeee!!"
"Hooh-rah! Nuff said!"
"Only til I pass right by ya!"

Overtaking the Player[]

"And that was a top secret special-ops-expert-maneuver!"
"Hooh-rah!"
"I told you not to mess with me!"
"Outta my way, civilian!"
"Large and in charge, ain't no way to lose now."

Rival Takes First[]

"Enemy number one is in my sights!"
"Gotta take 'em down NOW!!"
"Do or die! Do or die!"
"I've faced more difficult challenges in my day!"
"Outta my way! I got a mission to accomplish!"

Car-Fu Battle Lost[]

"Nooooo!!!"
"You are a vicious, cheating, no good..."
"Even in defeat, I can hold my head high!"
"Maggies drawers!"
"Do or die! Do or die!"

Car-Fu Battle Won[]

"That was awesome!"
"That's right! Hooh-rah!"
"Go home and lick your wounds!"
"Is this your exhaust pipe? Hahaha!"
"Proud and true!"

Race Won[]

"Is it a surprise?"
"Ooh-rah! Ooh-rah!! Ooh-RAH!!!!"
"I'm used to winning, no big deal!"
"Mission Accomplished!"
"It's good to be a hero!"

Alliance Broken[]

"Is there no end to your stupidity?"
"You don't expect me to back down, do ya?"
"This is not the way to treat a hero!"
"Kill! Kill! Kill!"
"I'll make you regret the day momma pushed you out!"

Refusing Alliance[]

"Sorry to break your heart."
"No, and don't hate me cause I'm better than you."
"I will only race with the best, not you."
"I'd rather eat my boots."
"You are not up to spec!"

Accepting Alliance[]

"It would be an honor to join with you."
"We'll make mincemeat outta them all."
"Ooh-rah! Teamwork is the way to go!"
"Then let's engage the enemy!"
"We'll blow them all off the track!"

Offering Alliance[]

"Can I make you the best offer you'll get?"
"Have you ever dreamed of being a soldier?"
"Join me and know honor, glory, victory!"
"Want me to protect your flank for ya?"
"Allies are the best strategy, be mine."

Car-Fu Battle (unused)[]

"Careful. I'm terribly delicate. Haha!"
"Fight, fight, fight! Hooh-rah!"
"Prepare to be annihilated!"
"You are gonna get slaughtered!"
"Don't mess with the best!!"

Alliance Broken by CPU (unused)[]

"All's fair on the battlefield!"
"Leave your emotions at home, and fight me!"
"You just don't have what it takes!"
"You aren't tough enough to hang with this soldier."
"I'd rather have you as an enemy."

Trivia[]

A colon is an organ in the human body that removes water from digested food. Also known as large bowel or large intestine. Not surprising, since Sempre Fi-Ber specialized in digestive aids.
- Colon is also the first five letters in the term colonel, referring to a military officer rank that is above a lieutenant general and below a brigadier general.

Speed Racer